just came back from kaki bukit camp after driving lessons... and it was really quite fun... now that i'm slightly better at driving the land rover, i can say that i really enjoyed this week's stay in sembawang and lessons in kaki bukit... this week, i drove around kaki bukit area, bedok, tampines and pasir ris... wahaha... and there was once i came super close to home... and the feeling was GREAT!!! i even stopped beside temasek JC for a while... hahaha... and to think i clocked 233KM on public road already... cool eh... wahahaha... alyson don't get jealous... hehehe...

aniwae, just to show how blur i am, i met this person in Sembawang camp about a week ago, on the bus, on my way to kaki bukit... on that fateful trip, i realised that he was a counciller from CJC, a judo member, and he lives just down the street from my house! to think that for two years, i never noticed this man on my many many 966 bus rides and on top of that, he's a counciller!!! lol...

anyway, on wednesday's ride back to sembawang, we started chatting about girlfriends... now one of my friend's girlfriend took his "ex" and him to go out together because his "ex" and his girlfriend know each other... but it's hard on him because he has to face his "ex" in front of his girlfriend... and he doesn't know what to do... so my this CJC friend told him to tell the girlfriend not to, and to tell her to "respect my feelings just as i had respected yours"... and it really shocked me from head to toe...

i would never have said that to my girlfriend because i find it way too harsh to say... but this CJ friend says that he has experience "matching up" and and "smoothening out" relationships that has been going on for more than 5 years... and many couples in CJC are his "handicrafts"... so my question now comes... am i supposed to say those words when the occasion arises???? and how to know when to say it and how to make sure i don't hurt the girl when i say it?? lol...

initially i thought i know enough about relationships due to my many friends who either changed girlfriends as often as they changed clothes, to those whose girlfriends changes together with the handphone, and finally to those who stuck to one for many years... but really, i realised that it has only been "he", "her", "they", "them"... but never "me", "i", "she", "us"... only when i tried to get into one and i see all my weaknesses popping out like an overloaded popcorn cooker... indeed, this goes far to show knowledge is power, but more importantly, experience is the wisdom to channel the power you possess to do work... and now, i realise i have neither...

so maybe god put her in my life to realise my weaknesses and to really start learning from others... so that i may one day be ready to take on a relationship with proper knowledge and experience... or maybe i'm just meant to be single...

anyway these are the reflections i had in camp after the very emotional weekend i had last week... and i'm still trying to figure out what triggered it... it seemed to just pop out of the blue... haha... and as alyson said: "it's quite seldom that guys become so emotional and sentimental..." and i'm still wondering why too... haha... well, as i guy i should be stronger and not kneel down to troubles... but how to know the line between being overly cold and insensitive and being too weak and indecisive? lol... human relationships are complicated...

ok, enough of emo stuff liaoz... in fact, i'm no longer emo liaoz... but i wrote those on wednesday in camp because the thought just appeared.. haha... today i came home and i received a letter from a sister in christ... and in it was this card on the lord's prayer... very nice indeed... thanks esther!!!

aniwae, my CJ friend introduced me to this song by adam sandler - i wanna grow old with you... it's very very very nice... and i'm looking for the mp3 to download... hehehe...