sometimes i love to be at home... where i can turn on the air conditioner and simply retire on my bed and let my dreams carry me away to fantasy... or where i can turn on my computer and let myself be surrounded within the digital matrix... or i can flip through my collection of video discs and let myself indulge in the thrill and excitement of every movie...

but that's where all the good stuff ends... i eat alot at home... and really, i mean alot... since coming back home from church at 2pm, i've finished about 100g of chinese bbq pork (bak-kua), a 1.5litre bottle of jasmine green tea, half a tub of ice cream (500g), half a basket of lychees (erm 50 pieces?), a whole set of Merci chocolates (i think there are 18-20 of those bar chocolates), and a couple of slices of honeydew... on top of dinner... ARGH...

in that case, going back to army camp doesn't really seem that bad a thing after all huh... [lol.. i'm starting to think that the excessive food is making my brain shut down...] but really, it helps me to slim down... at home, i'll just eat and eat and eat... and my parents just keeps topping them up... gRRR... i hate this lifestyle.. it's a lifestyle i've been living with for 19 years... and my birthday present for my 19^th birthday was weight loss... and i'm throwing it away, day by day... argh...

and actually, it does seem weird for me to moan and groan about my weight... i used to think it's ladies stuff... to have that bamboo-pole body shape [oops, hour-glass]... but what on earth is a guy, who is no where near thin, trying to achieve something that is that impossible... argh...

i really gotta stop eating so much...